Thursday, September 15, 2011

Pat says "God did it"

Pray the gay away.
Make a deal with the devil and get an earthquake.
Perform abortions? comes a hurricane.
Too much plastic surgery makes you look oriental.
Do you think someone is going to kill you? Well then, they should.
God is tolerant and loving, but if you stick your finger in his eye, or vote out a school board that believes in creationism...he's gonna get you.
Who is REALLY responsible for 9/11? Pagans, abortionists, feminists, gays, lesbians, the American Civil Liberties Union and the People For the American Way...yep, that's right.
Is your town having trouble with those pesky hurricanes, earthquakes, tornadoes, terrorist bombings, or meteorites? Stop having those gay parades, problems solved!
Is God to steering  hurricanes towards your company's  headquarters? Pat Robertson can pray it away.
Plan on going to Scotland? Watch out, it's been over-run by homosexuals.
Want to downsize government? Nuke the State Department Headquarters.
 And the latest bit of advice from the guru of the good-life Pat Robertson?
Got a spouse with Alzheimers? Get 'em a nurse, get a divorce, and get it on!
 Yep never-mind those annoying inconvenient wedding vows. You just agreed to those vows so you could get laid anyways right? (God is sending a hurricane after you for that by the way) Nobody really believes in anything the priest says on their wedding day.
 If your spouse gets a disease that causes you to be annoyed because they don't remember your name and they try to eat the couch, ditch them. It's okay, they are as good as dead anyways.
 Pat Robertson has been saying crazy shit for years and years and for the most part Christians have either agreed or quietly shook their heads. He has gone on receiving money and doing his little TV show , even becoming involved in politics. No christian has stood up and demanded for him to STFU. No christian has set forth with the same vigor used to convert sinners to christianity, to shut Pat Robertson's trap.
 Maybe now these christians who have sat by the sidelines and whispered "i'm not like him" whenever Pat Robertson opened his mouth to pass gas will stand the hell up and demand he shut the large hole under his nose.
  The only redeeming quality Pat Robertson has is he provides a prime example of what is wrong with most organized religions. It's okay to judge and condemn as long as your finger is pointed away from yourself. As time goes by that pointed finger will eventually point straight at you and you can either accept you are just as bad as any you have judged or you can be as bad as those you have judged, or in Pat's case, far worse.

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