Eric Cantor of the Republican Rhetoric Party

     Allow me to start out by sending out a message directly to and for Eric Cantor....  

Eric Cantor with all due respect would you please shut your fucking big stupid mouth and go the fuck away. Your ego is far too inflated with your own hot air for you to ever be helpful, insightful, or mindful enough so that you can qualify as any type of leader. I suggest you move on to a crew leader position at a Mc Donalds since your style reminds me of a teenager who just got his first chance to boss other people around. The United States is not comprised of kids who are working their first job and haven't had enough life experience to see you are a dick. Wait ,I did say "with all due respect" so let me rephrase that.... Fuck off idiot. 

     Let's watch this video so everyone can get an idea why I think Eric Cantor is an inept little weasel. 

 
    

    Besides the fact Eric has the look and demeanor of a punk ass preppy who spends the first 30 minutes of each day popping zits on his face and treating his acne, he is stuck-up. Eric Cantor thinks the possibility of his being wrong is less than zero. If you watch the way he holds his head and the mannerisms he uses Eric clearly thinks he shits gumdrops, and if he allows you to have one of those gumdrops you should be thankful, very thankful. Eric first referred to the protesters by saying they were 'mobs'. Isn't the word 'mob' a historically negative term when used by politicians? If a politician says 'mob' then don't you have a vision of money laundering, illegal gambling and corruption or other criminal activities? 

    It plain that Eric didn't see the protests as positive. He didn't even see them as people exercising their freedoms, they were 'mobs' , out of control and dangerous. Then when he is called on it does he back off the term? NOPE. Instead he says there are other things more important than his use of the word. Eric is in a huff because the Democrats are supporting the protesters position that big business is also to blame for the problems we are currently having. His position is not enough blame is being put on Washington. We can safely assume Eric does not plan on taking his plate of blame and trying to force it down. No, Eric seems to think he has a nice clean plate with some golden etching on it spelling out "COOL CANTOR" in a graceful arch. Well Eric Cantor I hope very soon someone or something comes along plops a nice big helping of 'you re not helping' on that pretty little plate. 

   All Eric does is support something that becomes more and more clear each day. The Republicans are not out to see this country come back and support the people who live in it. The Republicans want to see America come back riding on the backs of the American people.They should give as much and work as hard as possible, not for a better life for themselves but for a bigger America. A bigger America represented by corporations and bottom lines instead of the voices of honest hard working happy people. 

     If you are a Republican or a Democrat I want you too look at what is happening. This bullshit need to stop. The two parties can not get anything done and while the Republicans are acting like the biggest racist, greedy, male chauvinist, two-faced idiot dick-heads on the planet the fact remains they are just the worser of two evils. The Democrats are just smart enough to know when to shut the fuck up and do what is needed to keep the people happy enough so marching through the street seems a silly thing to do when there is football, internet, and i pads to be attended to and shopping to be done. 

   I don't know where this is all going to end up when it's done but I would like to see Eric Cantor at a fast food counter asking me what size fries I want when it's through. I don't know if he realizes the possibility these protests could go very wrong he doesn't seem to see that but then you wouldn't be able to spell Cantor without C-A-N-T.

The 99%

Listen to this-
"Don't blame Wall Street. Don't blame the big banks. If you don't have a job, and you're not rich, blame yourself," ~Herman Cain candidate for president.

Now this-
“The fact is these people are anarchists. They have no idea what they’re doing out there,” ~Long Island Republican Congressman Peter King 

And this-
"I regard the Wall Street protests as a natural outcome of a bad education system teaching them really dumb ideas." ~ Former Speaker of the House and 2012 presidential candidate Newt Gingrich

Republicans, just when I thought they couldn't get any more stupid. Besides their dismissive belittlement of the Occupy Wall-Street protesters they also seem to be blind too. Among the groups who are a part of these protests you can find labor unions, airline pilots, librarians, students, the handicapped, the elderly, and just your typical everyday citizens. The Republicans can't see anything but bored kids with purple hair. I keep hearing the Wall- Street protesters compared to hippies from the 60's. I wasn't around in the 60's and a lot of the protesters weren't either. They haven't just been protesting the wars, they have more than that on their minds.I can't tell you every issue that the Occupy Wall Street protesters are upset about but I can speak to my frustrations. I spent $75.00 at the grocery store last night. Among the few bags I left the store with were several products that had been quietly downsized. The trend lately is to lower the amount of product you bring home as if by magic. One of the magic tricks is changing the container shape a little cone shape at the bottom of the jar or bottle can saves lots of money. You are hardly going to notice that bottle of katsup only gave you 17 servings instead of 20, right? The katsup makers are counting on that. take a good look at all the items you purchase next time you go shopping and you will see what I mean. From Oreos that lack the filling they had in the past to laundry soap that comes with a 'easy pour' spout which also includes a bottle that holds just a few ounces less detergent.
 Making products using the cheapest materials, changing the unit of measurement so that even though the package reads the same, you are  getting less and paying more. Another trick is to make things look like they are being made easier for you because the company cares about your quality of life. Those little Coke bottles that are 'serving size'? Yea, that 'convenience' is costing you.
  Do you have medical coverage from your employer? Do you have to pay for part of it? Most of us do now. In fact the 'medical coverage' offered by most companies should be called 'medical coupon' since some aren't getting much more than a slight discount from what they would pay if they got coverage on their own.
   The Feds put some rules down on banks, pretty mild rules IMO. One of these rules regulated the amount a bank could charge you for using your card at a store. It really bothered me I would drive around to save $.02 per gallon on gas only to come out even cause of those charges.  The banks considered the amount of revenue they would lose because of the new regulations and figured they needed that money. Now you can pay the bank a lump sum of $5.00 per  month to use your bank card on top of the lowered fee they charge you at the time of your purchase.
 Gas prices go up hand in hand with oil prices. Even though the oil has been purchased ahead of the price hike you can expect the price to instantly rise if oil prices go up. Now if you think about that then you could expect that gas prices would go down along with the current oil prices, right? Hell no. IF gas prices go down it is at an incredibly slow pace. As a result of this practice and the raising of prices "just because" every so often the oil companies have been making record profits. When anyone complained about it the oil companies would reply "supply and demand" expecting that to shield them from any further negative image caused from their price gouging. Well yea there is a demand because people have to use their cars to get  to work to pay their bills, like gas for the car. Public transit is not even close to being an alternative for most people so they have no choice but to drive. The demand is forced and that is a bit unfair. I can understand if the oil companies were looking at some hardship that was going to hurt them if prices didn't go up but that's not the case because they are making record profits. Making record profits at a time when so many people are struggling to get a job and keep their homes seems a bit cold. I'm not saying they stop making money, make a profit, but RECORD PROFITS? The raise in gas prices also costs us more in increased price for goods and services because companies pass the rise in overhead down to the consumer.
  At this time about half the country has heard about the Occupy protests. Of those people 19% disagree with the protesters on their basic core issues, one of  which is corporate greed.
 19%....that is a very small percentage. In this country how many issues can you think of that only 19% of the population disagree with it? That figure alone should strike fear in the hearts of every politician in office and especially those who are sitting on their stupid fat asses talking shit (republicans)
   That idiot Newt has some nerve saying the 99% are a result of a 'bad education' cause obviously his math skills are shit.   

Tipping Point

When I get a bonus from my employer, it is taxed at 50%. When I had to withdraw from my 401k because of hardship the internal revenue service came after me and added interest charges. If I did not pay within 30 days they would take all the money available from my bank account. It did not matter that would cause me to be unable to pay my rent. The cost of a parking ticket is $100. The Santa Clara traffic Court made a mistake in recording a fix-it ticket I received. Although I had attempted to pay the $50 fine I was told by the traffic clerk there was no fine owed. Two weeks later I got a notice informing me I owed $300 because I had not paid the fine. I had an opportunity to despute. I replied, telling them the conversation I had with the clerk, her name, and proof I had been at the court. 2 days later they replied saying they had 'investigated' my claim, it was denied. There was no name, no information on how to persue the matter any further just an amount due. They filed paperwork to take the money from my bank account 2 weeks later and did so, without my consent. I applied for an apartment last week. I was denied because the credit agency they used said I was not approved. I have lived on my own since I was 18, I am now 42 I have never failed to pay my rent, I have never broke a lease. I have never been without a job.I do not have any outstanding debt. I do not use credit cards. One reason I was turned down was because my daughter, who is 18 has not established a credit history yet.Bank of America insists on creating the circumstances that make it possible to steal money from me. My overdraft protection covers funds in the correct order as to cause my account to have insufficient funds as many times as possible to result in the highest amount of charges to my account.
 I am about fed up with credit agencies being able to speak for my character. I am sick of banks who, when forced to treat me in a fair manner, find another way to add charges to my transactions. I am sick of lobbists making choices that override any votes from the people.
 It is about time something was done. If they won't check themselves then we need to create some balance. Pass it on.

Peter Popoff Stole My Money!

note:Please keep in mind my references to  god are only in order to give some perspective on things as a believer.I don't believe there is any proof of a god and therefore it/he/she/them does not exist.That would make it impossible for me to be angry at them/she/him/it so any religious people please do not get it twisted.Thanks  

There really is no doubt about it now. Peter Popoff stole my hard earned cash. I  sent him $3.00 cause I needed some debts erased and Peter assured me he was the prophet for the job. I just heard back from Peter and boy am I pissed! Here is what he sent-

Daniel, let me first say THANK YOU... for your faithful support.
Your faithful giving makes it possible to keep
this ministry doing the work of God in the
earth. . . and. . . it makes it possible for you to hook up to
the POWER OF DEBT CANCELLATION... Yes , Jesus said,
"GIVE AND IT SHALL BE GIVEN UNTO YOU"... Your
gift of $3.00 is already working for the kingdom
of God... and working to bring you a great
harvest.

Dear Daniel, .

  I believe of all the secrets of great achievement that eminent

people have known and Jesus taught the essence is found in this ONE

thought . . . "AS A MAN THINKETH IN HIS HEART, SO IS HE."

First, I must help you understand the POWER of this insignificant

faith tool...

  The laws of the land may grant liberty and freedom to all in the

physical sense, but unless individuals take it upon themselves to

cultivate their minds in a spiritual way... they will remain in bondage

in so many areas where they should enjoy freedom.

These spiritual laws validate the importance of specialized

knowledge as well as your dreams, purposes, goals and plans. Now if you

are ready to begin your journey toward TOTAL DEBT CANCELLATION... let’s get started.

    Moses was directed by God to stretch out a rod in order to roll

back the Red Sea... David was directed by God to choose five little

stones to defeat a giant... A prophet of God was directed to cast a

certain branch into bitter waters to make them sweet... ALL OF THESE

ACTS, IN THEMSELVES DID NOT HAVE THE POWER TO BRING ABOUT THE RESULT

NEEDED . . . BUT WHAT THESE FAITH ACTS E ACCOMPLISH WAS TO CONNECT MAN’S

NATURAL LIMITATIONS WITH THE UNLIMITED SUPERNATURAL POWER OF GOD.

That's what faith acts do.

   Daniel, now in Jesus’ Name, use the enclosed eraser just as I

instruct . . . remembering "AS A MAN THINKETH IN HIS HEART, SO IS HE"... Common

logic will tell you that this eraser does not in itself have the power

to erase your debts. HOWEVER... as you and I operate in Faith... we

connect our natural limitations to a SUPERNATURAL GOD... WHO CAN DO ANYTHING.

DANIEL, YOUR VISION ULTIMATELY DETERMINES YOUR DESTINY... Oh, receive

this into your spirit. Many have visions of crystal palaces, golden

streets, but few ever translate these dreams into reality because it

requires PAINSTAKING THOUGHT AND EFFORT... ONE HAS TO HAVE NOT ONLY A

VISION... BUT ALSO FAITH, THOUGHT, AND FOCUSED ACTION... for that Vision

to become a reality. ~

NOW LET’S YOU AND I VISUALIZE... YOUR DEBT CANCELLATION... See yourself

totally DEBT FREE because Jesus Christ paid the price for your total

freedom. NOW... let's put some faith action with this vision... TAKE A

PENCIL... not a pen... but a PENCIL... and write down all of your debts.

Total them all up..

    IN JESUS’ NAME, TAKE THIS ERASER... and erase ONE each day. . . then,

as you erase each one each day, say. . . " I COVER “THIS DEBT WITH THE

BLOOD OF JESUS... AND I DEGREE IT CANCELLED... PAID IN FULL...

AS I PERFORM THIS ACT OF FAITH ....AND ERASE THESE DEBTS"

Don't stop... EVERY DAY FOR THE NEXT 30 days or until all your debts are

erased, CONTINUE THIS ACT OF FAITH AND MAKE THIS CONFESSION WITH HOLY

BOLDNESS...

 DANIEL, FAITH IS BEING SURE OF WHAT WE HOPE FOR AND

CERTAIN OF WHAT WE DO NOT SEE... THOSE WHO PLACE ALL OF

THEIR FAITH IN OUR LIVING GOD WILL NOT BE DISAPPOINTED.

  Right now, put all your faith in God for the successful outcome of

your life. God now becomes your perfect conduit through which your

thoughts are channeled in regard to the formulation of your dreams,

purposes, goals and plans for DEBT CANCELLATION.

  Each time you demonstrate your faith in God through this Faith Act

by erasing your debt. . . understand, it also becomes a prayer. . . "ASK AND

YOU WILL BE GIVEN WHAT YOU ASK FOR" Prayer is simply having a mental a

and verbal conversation with your heavenly Father. THEN... you'll know

the response you will receive will be loving and true.

  No one is endowed with great faith from birth... FAITH IS SOMETHING

THAT GROWS SLOWLY CONTINUOUSLY INCREASING AS IT IS PUT INTO ACTION AND

USED... So practice your faith with me each day for the next 30 days. . .

or until each one of your debts has been erased. YES, ERASE YOUR

DEBT... ALSO, UNDERSTAND THIS IS PREPARING YOU FOR THE NEXT PROPHETIC

LEADING... -

DANIEL, THE NEXT PHASE OF DEVELOPMENT FOR YOUR FAITH WILL BE THE

PHASE OF EMPOWERMENT... as you continue to confess and erase debt on

paper and in your thoughts... with prayer and faith in God... God will

EMPOWER YOU TO ACHIEVE NEW HEIGHTS OF ACCOMPLISHMENT.

     Now, be honest, have you ever heard such horseshit in your life? Yea, me neither. Keep in mind Peter has no idea whether my $3.00 was needed to feed my kid or to help pay the electric bill but I was so desperate that I sent it anyway.  You know every letter if received from Peter has contained some kind of trinket or prop for me to use and pave the way for Peter asking for more money except this one acknowledging my handing over some cash. You would think  I could get a piece of gum or something for $3.00 but I got nuthin'. Peter Popoff is great with the rhetoric though isn't he? I wonder if Peter could explain one thing to me. This question is one that I've wondered about since i was a little kid. Even when I was very young it seemed to make no sense that god needed people's money. Why the hell would god need money? You would think he could at LEAST make sure the people and places people went to worship him/it/her/them had adequate funds for the bare necessities. You  would think that people who devote their entire lives to god would have some kind of medical coverage and the local  church should have some kind of spiritual disaster coverage. But they don't you hear about a church getting burned down by lightening at least a couple times a year and churches fall down in earthquakes, floodwater does not go around a church either.What's going on with that? I'll tell you what, if you apply the same logic to this question of mine as you would everything else that  exists then you would find the demand for money much the way I see Peter Popoff and his scam.. The problem is most people don't do that. Most religious people say that because its god there is a different type of logic which needs to be applied. That makes no sense, you would think god of all things would make sense sometimes, but it seems that is seldom the case.
   Peter isn't quite done with me yet so I read the rest of his latest letter...

   When the next 30 days come to an end, you, like Moses, will have grown to such a degree that empowerment will come along with a complete trust and knowing that God will meet all your needs. His purpose will be accomplished in your life and your dream of DEBT CANCELLATION WILL BECOME A REALITY...
SPIRITUAL FORCE IS STRONGER THAN MATERIAL FORCE; YOUR THOUGHTS WILL RULE YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES BECAUSE OF YOUR FAITH IN GOD. One thing stronger than all the armies in the world is an idea whose time has come. I say to you... THIS IS NOT A GOOD IDEA... THIS IS A GOD IDEA... AND THE TIME FOR ITS  FULFILLMENT HAS COME.
 

  REMEMBER, the cost of keeping this ministry reaching out to the world with compassion... continues daily... and let me say... this week your-support is greatly needed:
 

    Daniel, if God should speak to you to enclose a SPECIAL OFFERING THIS WEEK.., it will be greatly appreciated... and KNOW THIS... YOUR OFFERING aimed specifically at your desire for deliverance from this weight problem will come back to you as answered prayer and WILL ALSO BRING YOU AN ABUNDANT HARVEST!
 

  God says, vow and pay... if you have made a pledge of faith to this ministry.., then give toward the fulfillment of that faith pledge. Do what ever you can today... return your offering in the enclosed envelope. ONE MORE THING... would you please... take a pencil and WRITE YOUR DEBTS OUT ON A SEPARATE SHEET... AND GET IT BACK TO ME... I WOULD LIKE TO JOIN YOU IN THIS ACT OF FAITH...

SO, PLEASE FOLD YOUR OFFERING IN THAT SEPARATE SHEET... AND RUSH IT TO ME TODAY... THAT WILL MAKE IT POSSIBLE FOR ME TO JOIN YOU IN THIS ACT OF FAITH OVER THE NEXT 30 DAYS... AND KNOW THAT I AM STANDING WITH YOU FOR TOTAL DEBT FREE LIVING! 

Ok, so Peter Popoff has ended his thank you note with: Give me more.
Amazing, I wonder if anyone really falls for this crap. I  guess these days anything is possible. Hopefully one of those possible victims will come across my blog and it will prevent them from sending  their own cash to this parenthetic leech and my three dollars will not be wasted on buying a tin ring or some salt that will be used to steal from people who can afford it the least.

God debate, who really won? The audience.

     I watched/listened to a debate last night. It was Blair Scott, Communications Director for American Atheists up against Kyle Butt of Apologetics Press. The debate proposition was "God Does Not Exist" with Blair Scott arguing for the proposition and Kyle Butt arguing against it.
       I've heard Blair Scott speak a few times but I'd never heard of Mr Butt.
  The debate starts and Mr Butt steps up to the podium. One of the first things he mentions is that he has been trolling a certain "social site" and he came upon a comment on Blair's page. Someone had made a joke about Mr Butt on Blair's wall it seemed. Mr Butt was visibly not happy about being the butt of the joke and his comment about it was presented as if it had come from Blair or somehow been encouraged by him. Blair didn't make the comment, it was put on his facebook wall by a contact. We all know how that goes, none of us ever knows what the hell people on our friends list are going to say. If you post a perfectly innocent status next thing you know someone is telling stories about their bowel moments or some other random thing. Besides if you have the last Butt what do you think is going to happen? Do you expect people who don't know you, are never going to meet you, and probably think you are never going to read any posted comment, to pass up the painfully easy opportunity to joke about your name? Yea okay...
    After watching the displeasure flash across Mr Butt's face I thought for a moment He is using a facebook comment to put down the person he is debating about god? It seemed a bit childish to me and as he continued to speak it became clear I was right.
    Mr. Butt told his audience that Blair was sure to lose because you can not prove a negative. I almost expected him to reach out and point at Blair, cackle loudly and scream "We got you my pretty!" in a voice very much like the wicked witch. He didn't but he did ramble on for several minutes presenting arguments which have all been found to be incorrect or had still been considered 'debatable' This would have been business as usual but there was a hint of personal attack in Mr Butt's animus towards Blair. It continued through the entire debate, flaring up a couple of times.
   Mr Butt told a joke his opening came to an end. Blair Scott then started his opening. I was curious how he would address the fact that he could not win a debate where he had to prove the absolute non-existence of god.
    Then something very interesting happened. Blair admitted to losing the debate as it had been presented. He would not be trying to prove god didn't exist, he would be presenting some of the conclusions Atheists had come to and some of the counter arguments to Mr Butt's absolute claims. These would all be presented so that they could be considered by the audience. The audience would have to come to it's own conclusions. There was not going to be an Atheist standing on stage insisting everything he said was factual beyond a doubt.
   This approach was perfect for a couple reasons.
 1) If Blair had started by telling the crowd he was going to change their minds about god you would have been able to hear the minds snapping shut. He had only asked them to listen.
 2) No matter what was said from that point on, no matter how many times Mr Butt took petty shots and behaved like an egotistical prick who had all the answers. Blair was standing in front of a crowd giving them things to think about which would probably never been presented to them otherwise. Things that would help them make informed choices about their beliefs.
    I'm not going to go into the issues tossed back and forth between Blair and Mr Butt except one. Mr Butt said at one point the there were absolutes when it came to what was right and wrong. Besides showing that Mr Butt is unable to even consider another person point of view,it also showed how ignorant he is to the diversity of the world.
    Some people are going to say that Blair did not do well during this debate. While I can understand how they could come to that conclusion I found his presentation to be accurate and done with class, not by taking cheap shots at Mr Butt. Blair could have also admitted defeat and proceeded to describe exactly what kind of god the other side had shown to exist by using the bible. It would have been easy to paint the picture of a needy hypocritical being who seemed very bored and not very intelligent. That would have resulted in most of the crowd dismissing Blair as hateful or angry, the poor Atheist who just needed to find the love of jesus.
     Mr Butt gave me the impression of someone who talks to to everyone but his reflection in a condescending tone. I don't think he even one time admitted that he could be wrong. There is a saying that goes something like this "The wisest man is the one who realizes how little he knows" If Mr Butt possesses any humility at all he must be hiding it where the sun doesn't shine.

FaceBook- New and ...Improved??

Algorithm-origin


1690s, from Fr. algorithme, refashioned (under mistaken connection with Gk. arithmos "number") from O.Fr. algorisme "the Arabic numeral system," from M.L. algorismus, a mangled transliteration of Arabic al-Khwarizmi "native of Khwarazm," surname of the mathematician whose works introduced sophisticated





   Do you know what an algorithm is? Well for all of you who said yes you're wrong. It is generally accepted there is no formal definition for the term algorithm but for the purpose of this blog we will use this definition. An algorithm is defined as “a step by step problem solving procedure.Specifically I am talking about automated relevance algorithms. Now before you start to think this is some kind of technical manual, allow me to explain. Algorithms are used to figure out what you are going to see in your facebook news feed and they also are used to show search results that will be of most use to you. While I am sure this makes facebook more interesting to some people. I like to see things that may be totally outside the box. I want to see things I have never seen before so I can choose to like them for myself.

   Facebook is going to piss a lot of people off soon. Why? Because it is going to fundamentally change. Does anyone remember myspace? Well I work in the entertainment industry and I can tell you one of the reasons for the demise of myspace. While there was no single reason this one played a part.....People got used to it. When seeking entertainment we want something fresh and new, we use the hell out of it, then we toss it aside like a used rag and go to the next shiny object. People get bored. That's why your local fast-food place goes through a remodel every so often. That's why you change your style of hair and clothes. The same thing applies to anything we deal with. It's why husbands cheat on wives and why wives divorce husbands. And it's why facebook is going to change, they don't want to be the next myspace.
 You can get pissed if you want but this change must happen, and it will. Too much is depending on it , too much money mostly.
    The poke feature? Did you notice it's gone? Now millions of college students will have to find another way to 'hook up' That was it's original purpose, what did you use it for?
   Digital music services, ways to share your favorite music with friends, and the introduction of new ways to consume other kinds of media, including news, music, video with 'watch' 'listen' and 'review' buttons.
    Your profile page? It will resemble a timeline. With the ability to spotlight those important parts you can give friends look at what is most important in your life. New types of groups to share specific news content with friends, and even more specific security options will also be part of the change.

    Why all these changes? Facebook is seeing a leveling out of new users and reaching saturation in some countries, and an algorithm told facebook if they didn't change they would become the square root of myspace.

Pat says "God did it"

Pray the gay away.

Make a deal with the devil and get an earthquake.

Perform abortions?.....here comes a hurricane.

Too much plastic surgery makes you look oriental.

Do you think someone is going to kill you? Well then, they should.

God is tolerant and loving, but if you stick your finger in his eye, or vote out a school board that believes in creationism...he's gonna get you.

Who is REALLY responsible for 9/11? Pagans, abortionists, feminists, gays, lesbians, the American Civil Liberties Union and the People For the American Way...yep, that's right.

Is your town having trouble with those pesky hurricanes, earthquakes, tornadoes, terrorist bombings, or meteorites? Stop having those gay parades, problems solved!

Is God to steering  hurricanes towards your company's  headquarters? Pat Robertson can pray it away.

Plan on going to Scotland? Watch out, it's been over-run by homosexuals.

Want to downsize government? Nuke the State Department Headquarters.

 And the latest bit of advice from the guru of the good-life Pat Robertson?

Got a spouse with Alzheimers? Get 'em a nurse, get a divorce, and get it on!

 Yep never-mind those annoying inconvenient wedding vows. You just agreed to those vows so you could get laid anyways right? (God is sending a hurricane after you for that by the way) Nobody really believes in anything the priest says on their wedding day.

 If your spouse gets a disease that causes you to be annoyed because they don't remember your name and they try to eat the couch, ditch them. It's okay, they are as good as dead anyways.

 Pat Robertson has been saying crazy shit for years and years and for the most part Christians have either agreed or quietly shook their heads. He has gone on receiving money and doing his little TV show , even becoming involved in politics. No christian has stood up and demanded for him to STFU. No christian has set forth with the same vigor used to convert sinners to christianity, to shut Pat Robertson's trap.

 Maybe now these christians who have sat by the sidelines and whispered "i'm not like him" whenever Pat Robertson opened his mouth to pass gas will stand the hell up and demand he shut the large hole under his nose.

  The only redeeming quality Pat Robertson has is he provides a prime example of what is wrong with most organized religions. It's okay to judge and condemn as long as your finger is pointed away from yourself. As time goes by that pointed finger will eventually point straight at you and you can either accept you are just as bad as any you have judged or you can be as bad as those you have judged, or in Pat's case, far worse.

Peter Popoff- Pops Off At The Mouth

 So I've been bragging about my newest BFF Peter Popoff right? (see blog here and here) I know you have all felt at least a small ping of jealousy as you read about what Peter had done,was doing, and would do for me. One of my less loyal friends (Tim) who saved me from a burning building a couple months ago even told me "Dude I wish there was some way I could be as selfless as Peter Popoff. I'm sorry Reap, I just do the best I can." I looked at him and replied "Yea if all my friends were as devoted as Peter it would be like I was in heaven. You are only human man and I accept you as you are"  Then the nurse had to wheel Tim into his therapy session. It'll be a couple more months before he gets out of the hospital. 3rd degree burns can really screw you up I guess. I only got 2nd degree burns from the fire. The EMT said something must have been shielding me...weird huh? I didn't even know Peter then so it couldn't have been him...

  Anyways, I know a friend like Peter is hard if not impossible for most people to find, but lately.......well......this best friend stuff is something Peter Popoff seems to take pretty seriously.

I got another letter from him a couple days ago, this was number 4...or maybe number 5. It's getting hard to keep track.

  Peter now refers to me as 'brother' and it kinda creeps me out cause I'm pretty sure he is older than dirt, that would make him close to a century older than my mother.Besides I got my ass kicked a lot of times when I was younger and Peter never had my back once! Once I start looking closer at some of the behaviors Peter Popoff has been demonstrating I start seeing the pieces forming a disturbing puzzle.

Another gift from Peter

Take this piece of string for example. Peter bought this for 

me. He expects me to wear it around, put it in an envelope with some of my hard earned cash and then send it back to him! I have been in some dysfunctional relationships in my life but this is bad. Peter hasn't even taken me out to dinner yet. In fact, I have paid for everything up til now and I haven't gotten anything to eat yet. Besides I can't wear that thing, gold looks horrible on me.

   The next thing I  get from Peter is another of his letters. This letter, just like the rest, is more of Peter crying and yelling about the devil. He also continues to point out my flaws. 'I lost my job' 'I can't pay my bills' 'I'm a nervous wreck'  none of those things are even true! I can picture Peter telling god all these things to make me look bad. Boy am I glad I don't believe in god or I'd REALLY be pissed!!

  Included is some cheesy sticker I'm supposed to put on the bottom of my shoe. There is a packet of what looks like tiny pieces of  charcoal you would use to grill tiny little steaks. Peter says its 'magical' but it didn't even cook the steaks.

   Then Peter asks me for more money! The nerve of this guy! At this point I'm still waiting for the debt money to cover all my bills so I can pay god back for giving me money that Peter got for me. I briefly consider asking Peter for a loan so I can pay him to pay god so I can ask god for another loan and then give the money to Peter so he can use it to pay ......some angels... I think.... this is really getting confusing. I take some of the money that was to go to Peter and buy some aspirin, I'm getting a headache.

     A few days later....I'm just starting to forget my stalker brother. The whole crappy bar-b-que fiasco is a fading memory when my daughter comes in from checking the mail and says "Here dad" I look at her outstretched hand. She is holding several envelopes, one of them is pretty thick. "This one is pretty heavy" she says as I take the stack of off-white envelopes from her. I look down into the handful of mail and I see Peter has sent me another....something. I open the envelope while trying to remember where I had put those aspirins. Inside I find this...

Peter Popoff keeps sending me gifts...I can't help but think he wants something from me in return....like money

   I almost expect a marriage proposal to be included in Peter's 5 page rant but there isn't one. There is a request for money, again. The request comes after instructing me to do several moronic tasks which seem to be another attempt at destroying any dignity I may have left. 

1. Pour salt on the paper
2. Hold ring for 60sec
3. Blow salt off paper
4. Tell Peter what color the ring is
5. Write down problem(s) you want solved 
6. Wear ring for 177 days
7. See life change immeasurably in blink of an eye

Now I'm beginning to wonder if maybe Peter Popoff kinda earned that last name...

 The letter goes on (where are those damn aspirin?)

Answer 3 questions, find 5 divine personal priorities, 24 hours later receive first of  7 life-changing miracles. Now my head is spinning. How the hell am I supposed too remember all this? I'm gonna have to buy some kind of date-planner to write all this down or I may miss a life-changing miracle and then I'll be totally screwed. You don't see many (if any) miracles these days. If Peter somehow got god to do some miracles for me I gotta make sure I see them or god will probably think I am ignoring him. I really don't want to burn in hell for all eternity, that's not on my 'to-do' list.

     I keep reading only to find out Satan has been stealing from me! I wondered where all the forks had gone! My silverware drawer used to have a bunch of forks in it but the other day I went to get one and there were 2-3  to be found. That son of a bitch Satan must have took the rest of them. He is even worse than the bible says. Now my discomfort about Peter's behaviors is gone, I need Peter to help me or pretty soon I won't have and spoons to eat with either.

  Ok Peter now tells me he has had a vision. I have to follow his directions to get tangible and irrefutable proof of my bank account being stocked with 'fabulous divine transfers of SUPERABUNDANT BLESSINGS' Who cares if Satan forked himself with my stuff? I'll just buy new forks myself!

 After I do all this crazy stuff Peter asks then I will be set-up. I really don't want too wear that stupid, cheap ring for 177 days but what choice do I have? All that is left is to "Release the power of seed faith" in order to do that .....I ......need........to......SEND A CHECK TO GOD FOR $27.00 ?!!

  Not only that I'm supposed to hold up the check and say GOD I HONOR YOU AND  YOUR WORK, AND I SOW THIS $27.00 FAITH SEED FOR A GREAT HARVEST I TAKE WHAT I HAVE AND GIVE IT TO YOU, BECAUSE WITHOUT YOU I WOULD HAVE NOTHING....I SOW THIS FAITH SEED OF $27.00 IN JESUS' NAME I ACCEPT YOU NOW AS MY TOTAL SOURCE OF SUPPLY! AMEN"

    

      Fuck that. I have no money because I gave it all to Peter already if he is so wonderful at seeing into the future and having visions all the damn time, and talking to god he damn well should know that. Come to think of it I don't think Peter Popoff is talking to god . If there was a god wouldn't he/she/it/they already know I'm broke?? And if there was a god wouldn't it have better things to do than play circle-jerk with $27.00?

  The rest of Peter's letter is just more of his blabbering on about how I must do stupid human tricks in order for him to help me.I've come to the conclusion Peter is after my hard earned cash. It's almost as if I've had a vision. I'll keep you posted, I just got another letter in the mail....

Thanks To The Internet

      I remember before there was such a thing as the internet....back when kids played outside during summer..and fall...and winter.  . . ...and spring. I'm not going to say those were better times for a couple reasons. The first reason is because it makes me sound old, The second reason is because they weren't necessarily better, they were just different. So I grew up without the internet, using 'the long way' to do division and 'working it out on paper' whenever algebra wanted me to figure out how fast a truck was going if it traveled 13 times as fast as .36% of the speed of sound while driving in circles on a boat moving at 17 knots.
   Then came....THE INTERNET! Sure the internet was pretty weak when it first came out, but back then it was the shit. BBS or Bulletin Board Systems were the social media and it was all formed from characters and choosing Y, N or 1, 2, or 3.
   As the years have passed things have changed and as I look at the box on my desk which reads "Microsoft MS-DOS Operating System Version 4.01" I thought it would be fun to list some of the things that have been great and not so great about the internet.


    Porn- I never dreamed while I checked out the porn mags in my parents garage that one day the same kind of smut would be so widespread. Now it can be found in literally every room of the house. The Adult Bookstore down the street used to be like an Egyptian tomb only instead of clumsy drawings of cats people and bugs there were videos of women using every orifice they had to practice sex. And there were some with men doing the same thing! If you wanted to watch some woman get it on with a donkey a midget and a lava lamp (don't ask) you had to drive down to the adult book store and either rent a VHS tape at $8 a day ($10 a day if it was returned late)  drive all the way back home and watch a crappy quality tape(it probably had 5000 plays on it) and hope you didn't get herpes from touching the box. Or you could buy the tape for $296.00   These days? You can watch that shit on a laptop in the kitchen while you make hamburger helper dinner for the family !! Not that I would suggest you do so, but you could.       
Porn is everywhere on the internet and if you have half a brain you can get all the smut you want for free. you can even watch a person get naked in real time from half-way around the world!
  As for the adult book store, now they line the walls with a vast assortment of vibrators, dildos, something called a pocket pussy ( why you would keep a cat in your pocket in beyond me) and blow-up dolls. There are a few DVDs for sale in displays in the center of the store but they have been there a while. NOTE: I don't know about the bookstore from firsthand knowledge, I hardly even know where it is.

    Music- After being ripped off for years by the music industry we finally have our revenge by way of the internet. It is sad that some musicians got caught in the cross fire (not you metallica, you suck and its amazing anyone wants to listen to your music these days, even for free) They reality is, the music industry could have kept most people from stealing music if they had really been interested in what the customer wanted instead of what they wanted from the customer. They didn't so war was declared on them, they lost bad, and the musicians got caught in the cross-fire. Collateral damage...let's take a moment of silence...............ok next!

    Knowledge Base-The vast array of information available on any subject you could imagine and a billion others you never could. I'm not even kidding about this one. The knowledge available is mind-boggling. No more will people need too buy those 'World Book Encyclopedia'  sets that took up so much space it had to double as a guest bed. Now it's peck, peck, peck, click. The world at your fingertips

    Reunions-Getting in touch with old friends. It's been awesome being able to find those people you never would have seen again if it wasn't for the power of the internet. When you think about the number of marriages that have been broken up because of finding an 'old flame' it really gives you an example of the power of the net. And we never would have had the chance to meet with our old buddies for beers and adding them to facebook only to end up blocking them because they were just as annoying/stupid/crazy as ever if it were not for the good old internet.

     Email- No more writing letters. I hated writing letters, it sucked. My handwriting looks like somebody's last will and testament that they wrote 15 minutes after they died. It's bad and I have never been able to care enough to improve it. One time I wrote a letter excusing my kid from school and the cops came to my house asking why in my letter I was threatening the principal in french. Now it's peck,peck,peck,peck and click send. Now it's painfully easy to get the cops to come over and ask me questions about valid threats in emails.
    Customer Complaints- Have you ever bought a chocolate bar, opened it and found the chocolate to be covered in a white dust powder? I think that happens because the candy has sat around so long that enough dust particles have been able to penetrate the wrapper to make it a dust covered health threat. They have that number on the wrapper  to call and complain but most people don't have the balls to make that call. They have the address so you can write and complain but that means getting a reply and maybe a coupon for a free candy bar which will have arrived about 10 years after you reach retirement age.
               I bought some Oreos the other day. The quality was for shit (another blog on that coming up) so I went to the website listed on the package and let those Oreo con-artists have a piece of my mind. I got a coupon for free cookies mere weeks later. I bought a California Pizza Kitchen frozen pizza from the store. It tasted like I had drawn a pizza on some old dirty, dusty cardboard put it in the microwave for 4 minutes and put it in my mouth. What did I do? I went to the website. What did I get? A free coupon for the same shitty pizza. Sure, not the best remedy but at least there was a nice letter from the company saying they would look into the concerns I had.

    Public Comment- Now everybody and their mother has a facebook page, including companies and even network news programs. The other morning on ABC overnight news one of the anchors said something that I thought was unfair and irresponsible. What did I do? I looked up the facebook page for the show, clicked 'like' and posted a sarcastic yet insightful comment about his statement. The next day he had replied to my comment. His reply was weak so I sent him a private message explaining why what he had said was unfair and explained that even though I found him entertaining I couldn't let that pass. Today a bunch of news vans parked along the freeway caused a traffic back-up. I went to the facebook page for the news program and left a thanks for nothing comment for them. Never in the history of mankind have we been able to bitch and complain directly to the source of our discontent like we can due to the internet.


    Radio Broadcasting/Podcasting & Blogging- The number of people I have reached with my big mouth and pecking fingers amazes me. Thanks to the all-knowing internet someone who wouldn't have ever known I existed before can listen to my radio show and send me an email about what they think of it. Just like the last email I got, it said- Your show is far to long Why do you have people on your show when they don't have a radio voice. I have tried to listen to your show several times but you don't stay on the subject. Can't you do a more professional show? Yep, never before could I have had the chance to entertain people like that.
      Blogging has given anyone who has a keyboard the perfect way to say any kind of crazy made-up crap they want and put it on display for the world to read and comment on. It has also given some very good writers a way of offering their articles and stories so that those who would never had the chance can read them.

And here is the list of not so good things about the internet
    SEE ABOVE & Kiddie Porn

Peter Popoff- The Profit

My newest friend Peter Popoff has sent yet another envelope. And wouldn't you know it, he wants to help me some more. I don't know why,out of all the people who really need help, Peter has latched on to me. 
  And I don't know how but Peter seems to know things about me that I was not aware of. One of which would have the effect of scaring the livin shit out of me if I was a believer. What is the one worst thing here on earth? What is it that religious people place blame on when something happens that is so terrible, so ugly, so sad and evil that god couldn't have possibly made it, done it, or supported it? That's right  SATAN! 
  I bet some of you suspected what Peter Popoff knows for a fact....SATAN is opposing me. That's right, SATAN is causing me some real demonic opposition. You naysayers can READ IT IN THE LETTER. On page one Peter lets the cat out of the bag. I almost fainted when I read it. This would explain why, when I make cookies they always burn, and why it's always so damn hot in this house! The flies I thought were getting in because I don't have a screen door? I was wrong...SATAN brought 'em.
 The mixture of relief from finally knowing the reasons all these things happen mixed with the terror of knowing that I had bought those fly strips for nothing and I dropped the letter to the floor, too weak to grasp it any longer....
   When I had recovered my strength I bent to pick up the message and saw something had come out from between the pages. It was what Peter called The Aaron's Breastplate Medallion. Luckily for me god had reminded Peter to send it. From what I understand Peter had the medallion in his office for me beforehand. The thought of Peter Popoff taking time from his busy, busy day of meeting with god and praying to pick up small gifts for me brought a little tear to my eye.
  I guess the Aaron's Medallion is pretty damn special cause Peter goes on about it for some time and includes a chart to help explain what kind of assistance I can expect from it.
  According to Peter my worries about SATAN  are for nothing. My new good friend has my back. Not only that but 12 miracles are going to happen to me in the next 4 months!
  A thought occurs to me...my life is much more dramatic and exciting than I realized. I thought my life was pretty much normal but all kinds of strange, exciting and scary stuff is going on at my house. Thank god, or whoever Peter had brought this fact to my attention I may have slept through it all.
 Peter goes on for a few pages, and to be honest, he is kinda a buzz killer talking so much and repeating himself most of the time.

Aaron's Breastplate Medallion- Couldn't be to good at protecting from the occasional sword thrust. It is made of paper..guess that's enough to stop Satan though.

Chart that explains something....I'm not sure what but god is involved so it must be important.

Finally I reach the end where another incredible fact is presented. PETER POPOFF IS ALSO A PROPHET!! Wow could I get any more lucky in finding a friend with the endless abilities Peter has? I think not.
  My high is suddenly squashed, like a teenage pot head whose mom just took away all his chips. Peter needs $28.29 or $56.58 in order to get rid of SATAN and to get god to give me my 12 miracles. Son of a bitch! I just sent my last $3.65 to Peter so he could supernaturally remove all my debts.
 If anyone has any extra cash or change keep me in mind would you? I'm going to go hit up my neighbors for a couple bucks. I know that god's will will help me get the money so that I can send it to Peter to give to god so that that jerk SATAN will go over to my ex-girlfriend's house and I can enjoy my miracles while eating unburned cookies in a cool house with no flies. I know it will happen because I have Peter Popoff backing me up and he's a profit!